They key to breaking and starting habits: don't do it alone.
They say “the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over while expecting different results”.
Question is, on your journey to getting disciplined with your habits, what have you been trying over and over while ending back to where you started?
You’ve been going about this alone. And it hasn't been working.
You’ll usually start with a spark of motivation, but it soon fizzles out. If there's one thing the pandemic taught us all, it's that being isolated sucks. It also does nothing to keep you motivated, energized and optimistic.
So, if I had to pick for you a single low-hanging piece of fruit that could yield game-changing results, I’d say find someone and/or a community to help.
I have some tips on how to do this below, but first... why? What are advantages of a community? Well, there's...
Accountability: just having someone expecting you to check in with your progress is a huge booster. We’re social creatures and hate appearing inconsistent and flakey.
Reassurance: often it feels like we’re alone in our struggle. Especially with our social media feeds, it often feels like we’re shamefully behind as young adults. Of course you know that’s untrue—but we forget so you need to be reminded; and there’s no better way for this to happen than to hear about other people’s similar journeys and obstacles.
Key advice: sometimes, just the mention of a tool, method, resource or even an altered mindset can make a massive difference.
Encouragement: it’s so easy to get jammed in our own heads. Alone, we tend to ruminate on our failures. A give-and-take of encouraging and uplifting words can get us out of our heads, break negative thought-loops and boost our morale.
So where can you find that essential support and accountability by including others in your journey? Here are some ideas:
1. Professional help.
Professionals know to dig deep; to get to the core of your issues to begin the healing and growth from in the inside out.
Accessibility is often an issue, yet you might be surprised at your options. Check with your school’s administration or with HR. If that's not an option...
→ For Americans with insurance, here is a great guide.
→ For non-Americans, there are many publicly available and accessible services. Check with your local community health clinic, which is what I’ve done in the past.
→ If you’re still unsure, Google “how to find a therapist in [your city] reddit”. By including the word Reddit, you’ll find tons of posts with super helpful advice or links to database websites, government resources and non-profits.
2. Join a likeminded Discord channel.
Check out Disboard which is a Discord search site for open communities. Here I searched the tag “accountability”.
3. Get an accountability partner
If you’d rather connect with one person or a small group, post or reply to somebody in the r/getmotivatedbuddies subreddit.
4. THE TOTALLY UNBIASED BEST OPTION (apart from 1)...
Join in on the free Habit Reframe Method – Group Accountability program. We start this Friday (March 25, 2022)!
In this 4-week program, you'll be placed in a small Discord server with like-minded peers on a similar journey.
You'll be required to submit a weekly check-in designed for you to set goals for the upcoming week and to look back at the previous week to note what worked and what didn’t (remember the mantra Don’t get mad, get data?.. well, this is about setting that to action).
It’s totally free… but you'll need a credit card to join. Why? Because we wanted to make this actually effective if you join. You won't get charged, it's just there as a stake to keep you and the others in your group accountable. It's simple, submit your check-in on time and you’re good; miss your check-in and you’ll donate 100$ to a charity.
Seriously… this added pressure has all but eliminated drop-outs and will make a massive different for you. Last time we ran it, pretty much everyone saw tangible improvements in terms of dealing with procrastination and starting up on good lifestyle habits.
Check out some reviews here.
That’s it from me for now. I hope you have a good rest of the week.
Best,
- Simon ㋛